When we’re having a tough time, Are we steering the ship or trying to fix the storm?
Now, this isn't definitive; I don't know for sure. But what if there is always a lesson in our life experiences if we're willing to listen? Well, I think it's fair to say that I haven't wholeheartedly been listening lately. I've taken on the dubious task of figuring out life—what I need to do, what I don't, what's a good idea, what isn't. To some extent, this makes sense. We all have to take action on a practical level, but trying to control the outcome is exhausting.
What's interesting about this relatively short period of taking responsibility for how life unfolds is the feeling. "Shit" is a rather blunt word, but perhaps variations on this would be accurate. It's been sticky, has required a lot of effort, and as a result, I haven't shown up at my best. For example, this is at least my fifth attempt to write this blog post. I've heard colleagues in the Principles community refer to it as "Dis-ease." You may be wondering, what's interesting about feeling shit? How the hell is there a lesson to be learned in shit?!
Well, having wrestled with this feeling of being stuck in mud, I realised that no amount of effort was going to set me free. The minuscule progress just wasn't worth it. And with that realisation, as soon as I loosened my grip and stopped trying, I created mental space. What I saw was that the whole time, my mind had done what it's designed to do—to make my thinking look real. Nothing more, nothing less. There's no agenda. My experience wasn't linked to who I was with, what I was doing, or what I was up against. Purely the thoughts in my head at the time. There's absolute liberation in seeing this truth.
There's nothing for me to fix or change.
Nothing to fix because my mind was purely doing the job it is designed for. Nothing to change, no shit to shovel (Hooray), because our mind will do this for us. It's self-cleaning. Let me explain.
The deeper we hold a ball underwater, the greater the pressure exerted on it. Buoyant force means it always wants to return to the surface, back to its equilibrium. As soon as we let go of the ball, this happens without any effort required. The same holds true for us. The more we focus our attention on our "shit" experience, the deeper we go. The deeper we go, the more intensified our experience becomes. The amazing news is that we are built to reset. We do it all the time, perhaps without realising. We all fall asleep or find clarity after going for a walk, being in nature, or going on holiday, etc.
It seems to me that there is a beautiful simplicity to life and performance, a beautiful simplicity to our mind. When we understand the signals as guidance that we need to steer the ship and not fix the storm, we inevitably find ourselves back in calmer waters. A better feeling is always waiting. From this space, we all perform better, no matter the task.
So if you're having a tough time, whether in sports or life, I invite you to answer this question: "Am I steering the ship or trying to get rid of the storm?"
Keep it simple.
Matt
